A Single Mother's Journey Through College
"My name is Mariah, and I'm a single mother, a full-time employee, and a college student at Cal State LA."
Mariah's days started early. She would wake up at 5 AM to prepare breakfast for her four-year-old son, Alex. After dropping him off at daycare, she would head to her job as a customer service representative, where she worked from 8 AM to 4 PM. After work, she would rush to her evening classes, often arriving just in time. Her nights were spent studying and completing assignments after Alex had gone to bed.
"One of the resources that really worked for me was the university's child care services. Knowing that Alex was in a safe and nurturing environment allowed me to focus on my studies," Mariah explained. However, not all resources were as helpful. "I struggled with the financial aid office. There were times when I felt like they didn't understand the unique challenges I faced as a single mother."
Mariah faced many difficulties. Balancing her responsibilities was exhausting, and there were moments when she felt like giving up. "There were nights when I would just sit and cry, feeling overwhelmed," she admitted. But she found strength in her support system. "Most of my professors were incredibly understanding. They provided clear communication through detailed syllabi and were available for additional support during office hours. Their encouragement kept me going." Mariah also shared a challenging experience with a professor stating, “However I would be lying if I said all my professors were amazing”, “my experience in my Genocide class. The professor was really strict and not very understanding. I remember losing points just for being a few minutes late to class, which added a lot of pressure and anxiety. It felt like there was no room for any mistakes or flexibility, which made the course even more challenging."
Discrimination was another hurdle Mariah had to overcome. "There were times when I felt judged by my peers for being a single mother. Some even questioned my commitment to my studies," she shared. Mariah dealt with this by focusing on her goals and proving her dedication through her hard work and perseverance.
In the end, Mariah graduated with a bachelors in Sociology. "It wasn't easy, but I did it. I want other single mothers to know that it's possible. Use the resources available, find a support system, and never give up on your dreams." Mariah shared that her overall journey in college has been a mix of highs and lows. “I've had professors who were incredibly supportive and others who weren't as understanding.” Balancing a heavy course load with Full-time work has been tough on her, and it’s taught her resilience and time management. Despite the obstacles Mariah shares, “I've grown a lot and learned to advocate for myself. Each experience, whether good or bad, has shaped me into a more determined and resourceful student and mother."
Questions:
1. Can you tell us a little about your background and what led you to attend college while raising a child and working full-time?
"I grew up in a small town and always valued education. After having my son, I realized I wanted to provide a better future for him, which motivated me to pursue a degree while working to support us."
2. What were some of the biggest challenges you faced balancing school, work, and parenting?
"The biggest challenge was time management. Juggling classes, work shifts, and my son's needs often felt overwhelming."
3. How did you manage your time effectively between these three major responsibilities?
"I relied heavily on a strict schedule. Planning my week in advance and setting priorities helped me stay on track."
4. What motivated you to keep going during the toughest times?
"My son was my biggest motivation. I wanted to show him that hard work and determination can overcome any obstacle."
5. Can you share any specific strategies or routines that helped you stay organized?
"I used a planner religiously. I also set aside specific times for studying, working, and spending time with my son to ensure I didn't neglect any responsibilities." “I wouldn’t say I am perfect but I made it work and I continue to make it work”.
6. How did you find support from your professors and classmates at Cal State LA?
“Most of my professors were understanding and flexible with deadlines when they knew my situation. Classmates often formed study groups, which provided both academic and emotional support." However, because I was a college mom and I didn’t have much free time between caring for my son, work and school, I felt like I didn’t get to be a strong part of any team, these were the times where I felt most lonely and looked at”.
7. What resources at Cal State LA were most helpful to you as a single mother?
"The campus childcare services were a lifesaver. Also, the counseling center provided valuable emotional support."
8. Were there any resources that you felt were lacking or unhelpful, and how did you cope with that?
"Sometimes, the financial aid process felt cumbersome and slow. I coped by consistently asking for help and working extra hours."
9. Did you ever feel like giving up? If so, what kept you from doing so?
"Yes, many times. What kept me going was the thought of the better future I could provide for my son; I kept my eye on my goal. I often felt defeated especially when I wouldn’t meet a deadline, I wanted to quit and completely drop out but would remind myself of how far I have gotten”.
10. Can you describe any instances of discrimination you faced and how you dealt with them?
"There were moments when people doubted my ability to succeed because of my situation. I dealt with it by proving them wrong through my hard work and perseverance. I will not pretend all this hard dedication and work I have made has come slightly difficult, I have had professors imply I should take a break from school and people questioning my abilities to care for my child, I chose to not focus or listen to those type of remarks or comments”
11. How did your son react to your busy schedule, and how did you manage to spend quality time with him?
"He missed me, but I made sure to dedicate weekends to him. We had our 'mommy and me' days where we did fun activities together."
12. What advice would you give to other single parents who are considering going back to school?
"Don't be afraid to ask for help and use all available resources. It's tough, but the payoff is worth it."
13. How did your experience at Cal State LA shape your future goals and aspirations?
"It taught me resilience and the value of education. Now, I aspire to further my career and perhaps even pursue a higher degree."
14. What role did your job play in your journey, and did it provide any flexibility or support?
"My job was crucial for financial stability. My employer was somewhat flexible with my hours, which helped me attend classes and study. There were days I did not perform at 100 percent or close and it was worrisome and stressful because having stability for me is high priority"
15. Looking back, what are you most proud of in your journey, and what would you do differently if given the chance?
"I'm most proud of finishing my degree and setting a positive example for my son. If I could do anything differently, I might have sought out more support earlier on to ease the burden. I am also proud to say I am a single mom with a Bachelor's degree in Sociology, I am happy to share my story and I hope it can uplift and inspire many single or non-single parents to follow their dreams and goals”.